people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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