i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
