I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
