It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
