They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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