So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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