Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Welp...herpes.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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