is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize