Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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