Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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