he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
