Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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