never play flip cup with pint glasses
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
