we were pretty classy up until the second keg
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
