literally had 100 drinks last night.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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