You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Everyone says I win the strip club
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
