GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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