Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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