"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
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