im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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