He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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