I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
