I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
