Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
