Sry I called you an 8
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
