But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
