mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
