When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
