we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
