first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
