Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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