You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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