Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
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