Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Randomize
