In the future we'll all be gay
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
My vagina is officially offended.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize