honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize