they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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