glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
