If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
