Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Randomize
