Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
