Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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