Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
be right there i have to get my cape
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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