I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
