It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
