you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Can I color on your dick again?
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize