Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
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