its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
