a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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