i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
