This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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